If you’re feeling major cold feet, that could be a sign that you not be ready for marriage. Couple can have different degrees of readiness when it comes to marriage but when that difference is too much, that is a major red flag! For some people, marriage is part of the expected course of a relationship, while for others it is necessary.
Someone posted online that married men in Nairobi have two houses. One is hidden somewhere along Thika Road while another is in the leafy suburbs of Nairobi where the wife and kids live. There are some three guys who pay rent for some house. They have even furnished it so all they have to do is notify the other two when they want to use it for extra-marital affairs.
The best thing to do, when you are not ready for marriage like your partner, is to communicate clearly about it and either came up with a solution or leave the person before it is too late. Not feeling excited about marriage is normal, especially when you are not ready for commitment or are getting married for the wrong reasons.
Having your boyfriend of girlfriend ready for marriage while you are not is a common relationship problem. I can quote friends who were as deep into a relationship as being engaged but he or she is not ready to get married. They ended up getting marriage because it seemed as the natural progression of a relationship.
This happens while they still had conflicting attitudes towards the idea of commitment with their partners. Confusion arises and that pushes them to get married for the wrong reasons. When you are not sure of what it is and you know you’re not ready just stop because it will end in tears.
People think that divorce is usually an easy option but the financial, emotional and physical energy needed to go through it can be too much to handle.
Don’t break into someones heart if you plan to leave them in pieces. We have many people out there who are ready for flings but not everyone can handle heart matters.
Be honest about what you want, agree on a timeline and set boundaries as well as expectations. If they can’t handle all that, just leave…
Zulekha Kananu
If you are in love with your partners potential and not their present self, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you don’t feel connected, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you are keeping secrets from each other, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you think divorce is not a big deal, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you don’t want the same things, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you value independence, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you are not over your ex, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you are too focussed on your career, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you are running into it as a quick fix for something, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you are together for the wrong reasons,, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you don’t have aligning values, morals and beliefs, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you are constantly having arguments about the same thing, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!
If you already have an exit plan,, you may not be ready for marriage… talk about it or leave!