Why is it so hard to date African Religious Women?
Here’s what a close friend shared with me:
I have dated both Christian and Muslim women. I one conclusion I settled on is that it is a little harder to date African religious women because they tend to over-spiritualise everything. One of my x-girlfriends would quote a verse for everything I said. I felt like I was dating God or the bible because she didn’t even have her own words but picked up everything from the bible. At first this was interesting but it soon became too much.
We couldn’t hug, kiss, or even hold hands for too long because it would lead us to sin. I understood her but sometimes I just wanted to be in the embrace of the woman who I love. What is the use of a relationship if you can not be close and comfortable with someone who is meant to be your best friend?
Anyway, I accepted it all and played her game. I soon realised that I was no longer sexually attracted to her. We spent lots of time together but she ended up being my bible-study partner. She was the perfect woman in every sense but since she lived in the spiritual world, I was walking on this world alone.
Soon, it got to the point where we were ready for marriage but there was no spark. I would look at other women and even think of her as a sister. We couldn’t do this. So, I looked for a stupid reason to act like a fool for her to break up with me. That’s how our relationship, which my friends had nicknamed fellowship ended. It is the only break up I celebrated and for the first time I was happy to be single.
Sam Muregz
for a relationship to work, you need to have mutual values.
Religious people as you’d call them value their faith/belief quite highly. If you don’t believe in the same, one (or both) will end up frustrated.
There’s a guy who believes and supports that which got struggled with, and would struggle with that which you want.
So, if you aren’t interested in following the ideals of a specific religion, don’t even start, because if she’s the one who changes, she’ll be the one here asking such a question.
Stacy Wambui
There’s nothing wrong with African women, maybe the ones you have dated. Why don’t you make an effort to know someone before getting involved? People are different and can’t change because of love.
Sandra
First of all, OUCH!!!
Second, there is no problem with being spiritual, I mean, that is is their safe place and they love it that way. I think when getting into a relationship is genuinely knowing what you want from it and making sure that that your partner really understands them, ’cause after all, it’s a relationship.
Gerald Kariuki
I agree with you. There’s nothing wrong with being Spiritual, just get someone who is equally yoked with you and also on almost the same level of spiritual or intellectual maturity.
Manser Thelua
Dating any person is hard. Regardless of race, gender, status etc. This is a different person with a different view on life from you… yet you’re supposed to share life together each day. It’s meant to be hard. The goal is to find someone worth the pain and walking through it as a unit.
Martha Nyaboke
The traditional structure and dynamics of black churches, mostly led by black men, convey submissive attitudes to women, Cooper says, encouraging them to be patient — instead of getting up and going after what they want.